SF Ryan and NY Ryan meet  

Two Ryan’s meet at a local rooftop bar in a large metropolitan city. It’s 4:12pm on a Thursday. The happy hour rush has not arrived yet but the anticipation is in the air. There’s a touristy couple sitting at the other end of the bar chatting about where they plan to adventure off to next. Two people are behind the bar and a lonesome yappie is in one of the booths vigorously typing away at their laptop.

SF Ryan walked through the entrance of the bar and is wearing a grey Patagonia jacket with dark Levi jeans. His hair is nicely touched up in a hard part comb over. He is clean shaven but his boat shoes are visibly dirty. You would think he would get a pair of Allbirds but he still refuses to join that group.

NY Ryan enters a few minutes after wearing light blue jeans and a green neutral color shirt. His mustache sticks out on his face and hides his subtle nose piercing (SF Ryan notices right away). It is also apparent that perspiration is peeking through his shirt.

SF - Ill get a PB&J

NY - Martini please. Two olives

They wait in silence as the drinks come. Once arrived, they cheers and the following transcript is their conversation.

SF - Where are we at right now?

NY - Been in NY for the past month. Had to get away from LA. Going through a break up.

SF- Same. Cheers to heartbreak.

SF Ryan recently experienced his first heartbreak with Mindy. NY Ryan broke up with his most recent girlfriend a few months ago.

NY - Don’t worry, we’ll get through it. We always do. The only way out is through.

SF - Havent heard that one before….So is NY everything we thought it would be?

NY - Everything a little bit more. Pizza almost every single day, never have to drive anywhere because of the subway, and socializing has never been easier.

SF - Easier than SF? We go out pretty often here and its pretty easy to meet people.

NY - Yeah but NY has a wider range of people from all sorts of backgrounds. SF is too saturated with tech people. It’s much more fun meeting people in the entertainment industry or food industry vs the musty ass socially inept software engineer.

SF - SF happy hours stay undefeated but yeah I get what you’re saying. Do you think its worth going out there long term?

NY - Ah the golden question. Seriously im not sure. I get the same rush of emotions that i got when we first arrived in SF but once the honeymoon phase is over, I am not exactly sure. LA is the only place where I truly feel comfortable enough to call home. There’s family and community there which is what NY and SF have lacked collectively. If I were to move out here, this transition would be similar to my move to SF. I don’t know if i could last for longer than 3 years.

SF - SF aint so bad. We’ve built a community of friends around here.

NY - Yes! But the pandemic ripped that all apart. Everyone moved out of SF once their leases were up and the only remaining people were native bay area locals or the software engineer who don’t really socialize too much.

SF - Are you saying that SF was a blip?

NY - hahaha fuck, SF was just not what we thought it was. We made the most of a situation that we truly didn’t care for. Perfect example of a dream that fell short of expectations. Which is quite similar to what im trying to mitigate if were to move here. It comes down to this one question: would this move fall short of my expectations?

SF - What are those expectations?

NY - Cold winters, many lonely nights, lots of drinking and walking, a ton of socializing during the summer, eating way too much pizza and ramen, working at 10am-6pm everyday, meeting coworkers more often, going on weekday dates, unplanned clubbing, crying on the subway, missing the subway by an inch, taking pictures of tourist, getting lost in Chinatown, and missing family more than anything.

SF - Replace the pizza with tacos and you’ve basically got SF without Karl….

NY - Not really?

SF - Ok but I will say this - no matter how shitty the moment is, there’s always another moment around the corner ready to overwrite the present feeling. Remember the picnic days at Dolores park? You bet your ass you do, but you probably don’t recall too frequently the commute to the office everyday on the 31x that took over an hour squished in between strangers. Or leaving your card at Raven Bar three times in a two month time span. What about crying on BART because you wanted to be in LA with your friends? How did you make up for that? By joining a fucking dodgeball team and promising yourself that you’d make the most of the city while you were there.

Regardless of how shitty you are doing, remember that you are the type of person to seek out happiness from another source to redirect your attention away from the pain. Each day is a new opportunity to make yourself happy. Don’t forget that.

NY - I get it. It’ll be a journey regardless of the circumstances. There’s going to be highs and lows no matter what city I’m going to be in. The only city where I feel truly comfortable is LA.

SF - And there’s nothing wrong with that! LA is a great place for family and community. We keep going back there for a reason. You might be getting caught up in the romanticization of new places. LA is home for a reason.

NY - LA is home for a reason

The two continue to trade memories over a few more rounds of cocktails. SF Ryan leaves the bar and hops on a Muni line back to his Inner Richmond apartment and NY Ryan sticks around for a night cap to reflect for a bit.